As a full-time working mother of busy teenagers and caregiver to my aging parents, I am often exhausted and overwhelmed. I would like to make some changes for the summer and enlist my kids to take on some of the responsibilities with my parents, but I’m not sure how to go about it. Please help!

A: I completely understand and empathize with your situation. You don’t want the tasks to be a burden on your teens, rather you’d prefer they would willingly offer to spend time with their grandparents. First off, please realize that your family has been witnesses to your schedule and stress level for a while, even the best caregivers show signs of overload.

A good start would be to have a simple meeting and ask for help. Mothers and caregivers often attempt to “do it all,” but the truth is, we’d be better off asking for help – so ask! Let them know you “need” them. People at all ages want to be needed.

Assign tasks they might enjoy, and maybe brainstorm with them for ideas – even simple things – errands, baking, taking to lunch or a movie, household chores, etc. But also understand that they will need and want some summer fun time with their friends. If their grandparents are up for it, sometimes bringing friends along will boost spirits and make it fun for all. In my case, my husband, who suffered from dementia at an early age, always liked to be surrounded by our kids’ friends.

Above all, try to make it enjoyable and acknowledge their efforts regularly. Remind them they are part of your family “team.” Kids like teams! Reward them with positive reinforcement and remember that they will benefit from and enjoy seeing the less stressed side of mom!